DO OVER

Day 6....Not anymore.  We are back to Day one.  I will not feel guilt.  I will not dwell after this.  I will move on.  Over the weekend I ate horribly.  I have the habit of eating emotionally.  I have a food addiction.  I realize this.  I have been dealing with "stuff"  I don't deal well with the stuff because it is out of my control.  I like to be in control of everything.  there are things I need and want and when they don't go the way I want I do what I can control and that is what I put in my mouth,.  It is like I want to take revenge on what I can't control and say "take that. look what I can do." This obviously backfires with weight gain, not losing, feeling physically not right, and finally emotionally a wreck which then repeats the vicious cycle.  So I start over now that I recognize this revelation that I have always known but could never admit, until now.   So I start fresh.  I work on me.  I forget what I can't control and choose to make healthy choices I can control.  I take control of healing myself.  I take control of food not satisfying me but relying on the one who can.  the one who created me.  The one who breathed life into me and holds me in his hands to mold me into what he wants me to be.  I stay on the wheel and don't jump off.

I also ran 2.5 miles and smiled.